A mother’s worth

Samata RussellFeatured Articles Home Page, Islandmums News

As we celebrate Mothers Day, four days after International Women’s Day on the 100 year anniversary of the day (some) women were awarded the vote, we stand in a very different gender landscape.

We have seen women rushing from the confines of domestic labour into the workforce and the offices. Away from the sense of being second class citizens into the affirming position of a tax paying, contributing member of society.

We have adopted briefcases and suits, tucked our cycling womanly bodies away and stood shoulder to shoulder with men in a man’s world.

Some felt we were finished – we’d reached equality. Feminism became a dirty word, synonymous with man-hating, adopted only by a minority in dimly lit poetry slams.

A byproduct of this was that mothers got left behind. ‘Just a mum’ is a phrase too often heard and anyone who has introduced themselves as a stay-at-home mum at a cocktail party can watch people’s faces fall as they try to edge away. Motherhood isn’t always glamourous and it doesn’t necessarily command a huge amount of respect (or money) in the eyes of the working majority.

Things are changing once again though. Perhaps a positive repercussion of Donald Trump being in power was how his blatant misogyny shone a light on all the dark places where the female race weren’t really and truly being respected and honoured.

Women, now more powerful and free than we have been in eons, are rising to reclaim our voices, not as pretend men but as the extraordinary force that we are.

We are rising to change the world in our image – to become fully vibrant, nurturing, cycling, deeply feeling feminine creatures – and in doing so we are gifting men the opportunity to accept those more archetypically feminine characteristics also.

And it’s time to redefine motherhood within that.

We are educated, empowered, characterful women. Some of us choose to work full time, others choose part time, others stay at home to undertake the vital role of caring for children. We are a diverse bunch with an enormous range of talents, skills, financial means and situations. All of these choices are deeply personal and there is absolutely no judgement about whatever decisions you make – we’ve had enough of that.

Make no mistake that mothers are warrior goddesses. We create life in our bodies and nourish future kings at our breasts. We plant the seeds of love and struggle for future generations and our role within society is paramount. It is vital, beautiful, extraordinarily honourable and deeply worthwhile.

Psychologists understand that the primary relationship with our mother is fundamental to adult development and well being. In 15 years time, if you want less of a burden on our mental health care systems and less crime on the streets, support mothers. If you want healthy, well-adjusted, contributing members of society, support mothers.

Let’s recreate ‘brand mama’ and give mothers a new face for our time. Not dowdy and perpetually self sacrificing but an extraordinary force of love, an expert in human development, a warrior goddess.

Let’s rise mothers above our heads and applaud them for their grit and their goodness and their determination and all of the tiny acts of kindness that go unnoticed throughout each day. Let’s acknowledge that they are world shapers and that without mothers, we would be nowhere with nothing.

Above all, let’s become mothers that know our worth.